The Currency of Connection: Being Fun to Be With - by Barbara Lloyd (Shared with permission.)

When it comes to training dogs, especially the ones who are a little unsure, a little flat, or even a little wild, we spend so much time thinking about technique. Timing. Reinforcement schedules. Cues. Precision. All important — yes. But there’s a quieter kind of power that often gets overlooked: the value of having a history of being fun to be with.

That’s the currency.

Not the size of the reward. Not the quality of the toy. But the emotional memory your dog carries of how it feels to be with you. The lightness. The laughter. The ease. The you and me of it all. That’s what builds the kind of dog who leans in, shows up, and keeps coming back for more.

We talk a lot about reinforcement, but not enough about emotional reinforcement. How your tone, your presence, your energy fills the space. A dog who feels good in your company — who expects joy, curiosity, and safety — is a dog who will want to train with you. They’ll bring their full self to the game. And the ones who struggle with stress or disengagement? They need this more than anything.

So when you’re building your training relationship, ask yourself:

Do I feel like a great place to be?

Not perfect. Not polished. But joyful. Safe. Lighthearted. Do we laugh together when things go sideways? Do we celebrate tiny tries? Does my dog think I’m someone worth checking in with just because it feels good?

Because if you build that history — of being fun to be with, of being the highlight of your dog’s day — then when you ask for something hard, they’ll try. Not because you forced them. Not because you tricked them. But because they trust that the work is part of something wonderful.

And that kind of trust? That’s priceless.